Several weeks ago I sat here in my kitchen f5ing the ever living shit out of the PCTA website (sorry y'all) to no avail. Us prospective 2017 thruhikers broke the website. As is usual and quite understandable. I had two dates in mind, one in late April and the other in early May.
I got the May date after somehow magically getting through. Unbeknownst to me at the time my start date is on my great grandmothers birthday. May her tenacious and tough as nails Taurus spirit go with me while I walk! I am glad for the May start due to the current very high snow year (insert nervous laughter).
Just a few days ago, my permit arrived via email and the reality seeped in a bit deeper.
These past few weeks since applying for it, have been great and challenging, but also a bit unnerving as this great shift begins to take hold.
I've been working very diligently this past year to save money and now that it is time to begin spending that money I feel a lot of fear. It's a little uncomfortable for me to have saved up this untouchable money and now be able to... touch it. It stresses me out to have to buy things. Even though I am also excited to be buying these things for the trail. I just get uneasy seeing that number dwindle. Doing this thing takes careful budgeting.
Being tossed, or rather should I say, stepping into a very real unknown, a very physical and financial unknown is unsettling for me. Especially when you've spent almost the better part of a decade building a lovely secure system for yourself only to dismantle it and cast it to the wind.
I remember wistfully sitting here a year ago wondering how I'd be feeling right now in this moment. Excited, fearful, accepting, worried, joyful. Feeling all the feels.
In the weeks leading up to my leave date, I'll be writing about a number of things I have been and will be working on in preparation for my hike.
Thank you to everyone who has expressed interest in my hike and this journey I'm taking. Till then, y'all!